A disturbing new film has documented the torment and grief women suffer when married to men who want to identify as women.

Behind The Looking Glass, a documentary by Lime Soda Films, claims to be the first deep dive into the stories of 'trans widows' - women who have split, or want to split, from their male transitioning partners. 

In the film, the women say they are forgotten victims of domestic abuse and reveal that their partners were often unfaithful and took advantage of them financially.  

The women explain that while their partners received therapy and support through their transition, they themselves were left without access to the same resources. 

'It often feels though that our stories are just whispers in a storm,' confessed one widow, who chose to keep her identity hidden.

The film documents eighteen women’s stories, and the hidden sorrow and trauma the families experience.

Women break down and share how difficult it is to raise their children in the face of such sorrow and grief. 

One woman named Ginny revealed how she is now reduced to a 'blubbering mess' when she speaks about how her husband, with whom she has four children, revealed they wanted to transition. 

Others spoke of the abuse they received during the transitioning process, particularly if they didn't 'affirm' their partner's new identity. 

Julietta said: 'It didn't take me long to end the marriage, especially after Jack physically assaulted me for not affirming him. My son and I moved out of the family home and couch surfed for a few months.'

Others experienced emotional manipulation. 

Julietta said: 'Over time he had me convinced I was mentally unstable and too far damaged to be fixed. It took me months after the separation to see that this was mental and emotional abuse.' 

While Julietta has a Domestic Violence Order against her ex due to the physical assault, the ex is still allowed contact with their child. 

Horrifyingly some also abused their own children.

Another, Marigold, said the abuse even began extending to their children. She said: 'He would get home and he would just start yelling for hours, about all the ways I failed him. 

'And then it got to the point where if the kids touched something, he would take their hand and smack it on the table. He blamed me and said my lack of good parenting has forced him to take more action.' 

Marigold claimed her partner told her that she must identify as bisexual if she wanted them to stay together, despite her protesting she is a straight woman.

She was forced to take drugs and said being intimate was like an “out of body” experience with a “stranger.”

'And I would ask him to stop and he would not stop, or he would want to do something that was painful to me and he didn't seem to care.' 

Financial stress is another factor that was addressed as some of these men refused to work or caused so much grief for the ‘trans’ widow that the wife could no longer work. Therapy was all geared positively toward the male’s sexual fetish with an emphasis on the wives being tolerant and inclusive for the man’s sake.

Shannon, another trans widow, said: 'In a marriage, where a man started to use drugs or cheated on you, you would find therapists and support groups and other women who would say this is not your fault, but on this topic people are very quick to question whether or not you responded to it correctly.’ 

The film is an important and harrowing account of the collateral damage that happens when lies and deception are legislated and celebrated.